And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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