I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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