she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
it hurts more in the daytime
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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