I want to make a zoo with you.
i think i have two assholes
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
