I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
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