you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?