but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize