I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
