Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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