**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
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