Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
