She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
