oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize