put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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