There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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