Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
