i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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