so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
