so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
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