It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.