yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
