I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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