last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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