im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
