I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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