i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
