I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize