I think i sorta joined a cult last night
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I have fence marks all over my body
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
