I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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