You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
please come you make the beer taste better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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