I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
there is puke in my bra ... again
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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