i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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