I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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