Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I love you.
Bad choice
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize