IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
