it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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