One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
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