I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize