getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize