So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
