Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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