just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Blood and glitter go together right?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
