whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
be right there i have to get my cape
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
