I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
