Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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