I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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