Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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