i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
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