Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Randomize
