im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
