quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
